Lie Me To Rest...

This piece was inspired by Gil Scott Heron's song "Home Is Where The Hatred Is" Here are the lyrics:

"I'm on my way home

I left three days ago, but noone seems to know i'm gone

Home is where the hatred is

Home is filled with pain and it,

might not be such a bad idea if i never,

never went home again

stand as far away from me as you can

and ask me why

hang on to your rosary beads

close your eyes to watch me die

you keep saying, kick it, quit it, kick it, quit it

God, but did you ever try

to turn your sick soul inside out

so that the world, so that the world can watch you die

home is where i live inside my white powder dreams

home was once an empty vacuum

that's filled now with my silent screams

home is where the needle marks

try to heal my broken heart

and it might not be such a bad idea if i never,

if i never went home again"

17 years old and thrust into a lion's den...no prayers offered to save me...no faith at the time to protect me...no God (or so I thought) to bless me...he wasn't really listening to my prayers...or was he?...prayers sounding like voice mail messages...Hey God...it's me...you know?...SE7EN?...Well, I was just wondering...umm...could you...help me pay these bills?...I mean its cool if you don't want to...I'm just saying...Hit me back when you get a chance...Peace...

something I never had until later...3 years of finding myself had me regressing...9 months of indecision had me stressing...5 and a half years turned to 6 and I'm asking where's the blessings?...that everybody else is getting...Instead I'm having my back pushed against the wall...in a delusional centrifuge...where real is recognized...but it makes enemies of fools...

i've stared deep into the eyes of lies...dying to be real again...dying to be better...but the weight keeps crushing him...let it go...bring it back...together...we'll make you the truth...if you want to realeyes what i see then its up to you...

oppressed...depressed...suppressed...hated...debated...excommunicated...left for dead...now i rise from the ashes...so just call me lazarus...though I could be a phoenix instead...i don't fly...much rather stay grounded...on my own two feet...plus I never got burned...too much like hell...I lived there anyway...

in a city known for a proud warrior chief...i had my heart destroyed...my integrity attacked...and my money shot down the toilet...friends became enemies...some say the chief left this city with a vanguard of men and riches from the spaniards...i left with a strong will...a new lease on life...and my self-respect taken back from niggers...(with the -er)

if the love of money is the root of all evil...does that make the love of self it's cousin...does that make the hatred of another it's brother...i'm just wondering...because i hate niggers that beat on their woman...i hate to see niggers that fight over nothing...i wonder how long it can last...hatred...disdain...dislike...whatever...it doesn't matter...i'll wait...

my last trip out of crimson city...i left bloodied and bruised...the red on the jerseys of the football team reminded my of rivers of blood running through the cotton fields of alabama...mississippi...arkansas...from then to now...niggers doing the work...white man reaping the profits...run...nigger...run...roll tide...

i wanted to be loved...i love to be wanted...to be cast away...brokenhearted...was never my intention...thank you...for making me...stronger...if i died now...i wouldn't change anything...bye queen...bye my friends...buy my university...here i die...as they lay me to rest...i'm sure they...will lie me to death...au revoir...